Tadhg Maguire wakes to find himself spooning a dead man. The stiff is Tony Marino, lieutenant to mobster Aldo Pirelli. It doesn’t matter how the local enforcer ended up between Tadhg’s sheets, Pirelli is liable to leap to the wrong conclusion and demand rough justice.
The right thing to do would be to call the cops.
The sensible thing to do would be to disappear. Forever.
The only other option is to get rid of the body and pretend it was never there. No body, no crime.
What he needs is a couple of friends to help dispose of the heavy corpse. Little do Tadhg’s friends know what kind of reward they’ll receive for their selfless act – threatened, chased, shot at, and kidnapped with demands to return a million dollars they don’t possess.
By mid-afternoon Tadhg is the most wanted man in America. Not bad for someone who’d never previously had so much as parking ticket.
If he survives the day he’s resigned to serving time, but not before he saves his friends from the same fate.
“Stiffed is a massively enjoyable, fast-moving and very funny black comedy of errors that comes across like Hitchcock’s The Trouble With Harry directed by the Coen Brothers.” – Paul D. Brazill author of Guns Of Brixton, Gumshoe, 13 Shots Of Noir.
A short extract can be found on Spinetinler Magazine
You can buy Stiffed as:
An ebook: Amazon US and Amazon UK
A paperback: Amazon US and Amazon UK
"Stiffed was a genuinely very entertaining and equally funny read. Not only has Kitchin constructed a very readable and compelling plotline, but the comic touches are a joy. There ar numerous completely laugh-out-loud moments that appealed to my dark sense of humour, and I loved the interplay between Tadhg and his friends, who bring a whole new level of ineptitude to the world of body disposal. All in all, a bit of a hoot!" Raven Crime Reads
"Rob Kitchin's new novel, Stiffed, is (to borrow Paul Cain's phrase) a fast one (and a funny one). It's a farce with guns and bodies instead of sex. ... the noir author that Stiffed resembles most is probably Donald Westlake, in some of his various incarnations: Westlake set a high standard for this sort of dark comedy, and Kitchin proves a worthy successor, in an even more tightly wound and rapid farce than those of the his predecessor." International Noir
"Stiffed is a quick and undemanding read which should appeal to Carl Hiaasen fans. The cast of characters is good company and the story never loses pace. In true screwball-noir style, the balance of power shifts every chapter, in a whirlwind of shoot-outs, kidnaps, escapes, hostage exchanges, and car chases. A good one for the beach." Euro Crime
"Stiffed is a farce, a crazy comedy and a black tale written in a humorous tone. As such, some essential features are: an amateur detective, a ‘femme fatale’ and a dizzying action full of ridiculous but funny situations. It’s also an easy and enjoyable read. ... Above all, it’s nicely written. The plot is interesting and well structured, and the characters are very attractive. Tadhg and his friends will be hard to forget. And, who knows, maybe we can see them again one day. A highly recommended reading." The Game's Afoot
From another small press churning out novels that are often more interesting than those produced by the majors with their conglomerate concerns. Kitchin's book is a hilarious and frightening Westlakesque tale about keeping one's friends, getting rid of unwanted corpses and how to deal with the subsequent fall-out. [T]horoughly entertaining and not without a smidgen of social value. Woody Haut's Blog
As a black comedy [Stiffed's] superb, with likeable good guys (for the most part) going that extra mile in the name of friendship. [It was] enjoyable, amusing, fun, interesting, a few laugh out loud moments and [provided] a few moments of quiet contemplation whilst I considered my own friendships. A welcome diversion from my usual fare of grittier crime books. A wee bit like the first Dortmunder novel I read from Donald Westlake – The Hot Rock. Col's Criminal Library
"Stiffed is a fun book. No reader will be intellectually challenged. There are no complex troubled characters but there is enough reality to the plot. It is a literary romp to be enjoyed at a breathneck pace. Readers will enjoy and identify with Tadhg’s very, very, very, very bad day. While I abhor the term “beach reading” it would be a good book to take on summer vacation. You are bound to chuckle while reading it." Mysteries and More
"Total madness. Fun and nutty ride from the first paragraph. A lot of characters to keep track of and a bit confusing at times. Funny as hell and tons of violence. Excellent." Brandon Nagel, Goodreads.
Blog post on Confessions of a Mystery Novelist
Blog post: How I came to write this book on Pattinase